Joe, have you purchased your plane ticket yet? " I inquired as we sat playing video games together.
“No. I reconsidered. "I am not going."
“What? Are you going to Australia? This vacation has been months in the making! " I was taken aback.
"I don't feel like it." "We'll go another time."
I tried unsuccessfully to persuade my friend to reconsider over the next few weeks. Joe changed his mind when he changed his mind. Our big post-college adventure to Australia had been canceled.
And none of my friends wanted to take his place.
If I wanted to travel, I'd have to do it on my own.
So, in 2004, I traveled alone to Costa Rica. That trip was what sparked my interest in travel. That trip inspired me to travel more, to visit Thailand, and to quit my job to travel the world.
Joe's absence was the best thing that could have happened to me.
But his refusal to leave was a pattern that had repeated itself over and over. While a few friends have joined me here and there along the way, plans to meet friends in far-flung places don't always work out. When it comes down to the wire, "something" always happens and they're suddenly too busy, change their minds, or can't afford it.
It's taught me that if I wait for others to do things for me, I'll never get anywhere.
There are places I want to visit, people I want to meet, experiences I want to have, and foods I want to try — and only so much time to do it all.
So I'm not going to wait. I will not allow others to prevent me from achieving my goals.
It can be frightening to travel alone, especially if you've never done so before. Growing old without experiencing everything you want from life, on the other hand, scares me even more.
Stop putting off a trip because you're waiting for someone to accompany you. Simply leave. Don't let others keep you from achieving your goals. Trust me, you'll make plenty of friends along the way, from other solo travelers who thought, "Screw it, if I don't go, I'll never go," to locals eager to meet new people.
When I travel, I've discovered that you're never alone. I was concerned that if I did not travel with friends, I would be alone. I'd never be able to make friends. However, you make so many on the road that you have to go out of your way to be alone! You're always surrounded by people!
Solo travel allows you the most freedom. When you wake up, it's just you — whatever you want, wherever you want, whenever you want. You meet yourself in that freedom and infinite space of possibility. You've reached your limit in terms of what you like and dislike. There is no one to push you in any direction or to override your reasons. Do you want sushi? Purchase sushi. Do you want to leave? Leave. Do you want to try bungee jumping? Take a chance.
It's sink or swim, and you must learn how to survive — who to trust, how to make friends, and how to navigate alone. The greatest benefit of solo travel is personal growth. Every time you leave, you learn to be a little more self-sufficient, confident, and in tune with your emotions and desires.
Traveling alone is not for everyone. Some people return home soon after leaving, while others cry for weeks before accepting it, and still others accept it right away. But you'll never know unless you travel alone at least once. Try it at least once, whether it's a weekend getaway, a two-week vacation, or a trip around the world.
Don't put off living your dreams because of people. You could be waiting a long time before someone says yes. There is only now — and if you don't go, you will be sorry.
Because if I hadn't stopped waiting, I'd still be in my cubicle, pleading with Joe to accompany me to Australia and wondering if I'd ever get to see the world.
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